Bringing Harmony into Interpersonal Relations
by Master Lee Feng San Shifu
Translated by Sophia Lui
Edited by Ric Meyers
Happiness comes from our ability to create harmony in our interpersonal relations.
Towards the end of the year 92 in the R.O.C. Calendar (2003 in Western Calendar), Madame Jiang Kai Shek passed away peacefully in her sleep. Some people regard her as a most fortunate and blessed person because she was able to seize opportunities and live life to the fullest.
Why was Madame Jiang able to age gracefully and stay healthy? It is because, having weathered life’s ups and downs, she developed the ability to bring harmony into her surroundings. From her illustrious career, we can tell she had developed this amazing ability above and beyond an average person’s level. This is reflected in her interactions with her staff, and her handling of international affairs. To develop this ability, we must first learn to harmonize mind and body, and then we will be able transfer this inner harmony into our relations with other people.
The key to creating harmonious relationships often lies in our awareness of the little things. This character trait can be seen in the many touching incidents during the lifetime of Madame Jiang. For example, there was a time when Madame Jiang was on board a plane. Shortly after take-off, she requested for the plane to turn back because she realized she had forgotten to bid farewell to her staff. After the plane returned and landed, she disembarked and shook the hands of all those who came to see her off. This thoughtful gesture touched all those who were present at the time.
If one wishes for happiness, one does not get it by “pursuing” it. Many people pursue happiness all their lives, and yet, when they get what they wish for, they also find they lose something along the way. Sometimes the reverse happens. We may lose something on the one hand, but also gain something else on the other.
If we wish for happiness, we should try to connect with the people around us — creating a genuine sense of camaraderie with them. Furthermore, if we wish to gain the respect and appreciation of others, we should not make deliberate attempts to do so. Rather, we should first aim for self-mastery, then our interactions with others will naturally become selfless and harmonious. In this way, we need not pursue happiness, as it will naturally come our way.
“Those who gain command of themselves command others. By selflessly bringing harmony into our interactions with others, happiness will come our way.” — Lee Feng San Shifu